missing

I was looking through this blog earlier this week and it only occurred to me that with the death of the other one, I have actually lost quite a lot of content.

Now I know I had virtually zero readers bar myself but then again, most of those posts were written for me as a record of what goes through my head. Some of those were reactionary so whatever I had written back then would've been a decent snapshot of how my mind was working back then and I can read those words with a fresh mind and perhaps a fresh perspective.


Except it is now all gone.


It's a funny feeling.
I've never held onto anything like that in any precious sort of way and knew from day one that it was more or less an exercise in indulgence; an ego stroking pursuit as it were. Now that it is gone, I wish I had kept more of them in an easily accessible form like a simple notepad doc or something.

I've always tried to write as plainly and as simply and as honestly as I can so I guess there is a part of me that feels that I have lost something now. Those that have known for the longest all say that I don't ever seem to change and those words that I put down could well have been my only record of who I used to be, that I could look at and see my reflection.


Perhaps that is an indicator that I should put a little more effort into this remaining one.